The Charming Tyrants

The Charming Tyrants

Good Words

God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears and light for the way. - Anon

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Kids Say the Darnedest Things!

This post could alternatively be titled "Patriotism" or "The "F" Word".  Speaking of the "f" word, I don't mean that "f" word I mean the other one, you know, fart, flatulence, fluffy, or what ever you call it at your house.

The other day as HT and I were out doing a few errands we drove past an american flag and he got all agitated and pointed and shouted, very annoyed, "Look dere's a flag!"

Me, trying to deflate the situation, said, "That's an american flag, isn't is lovely, waving in the wind?"

He just fumed.  Then we saw another and another, at the credit union, at the mall, at the fire station, and every time he saw one he got madder.

"Look dere's another one, WHY ARE DEY DOING DAT?!"

I tried to explain to him that they were flying the flag as a symbol of their patriotism, that they were proud to have the flag of our country at their place of business.

Finally I asked, "Why are you getting so upset?"

"Because, it FREAKS ME OUT!"

"Why is it freaking you out?"

"'Cuz, it makes me FART!"

Me, trying desperately to stifle my laughter,  "Really?"

Him, "All da time, it weally, weally does!"

Good to know.

I guess.

I can just picture him in Kindergarten learning the pledge of allegiance, with his little hand over his heart.  "I pledge allegiance to the flag (bpoot) of the United States of America . . . " or while singing the national anthem, "Oh, say can you see (bpoot) by the dawns early light . . . "  Poor boy will be laughed out of school, or sent to the principal's office.

Speaking of farts, Papa likes to blame the kids for his, do all men do this or is it just my husband?  I told him we had some really talented kids.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"They're ventriloquists." I said.

Blank stare.

"Yeah, if they can make their farts come out your hiney, that's talent!"

I'm just sayin'.


Rebekah said...

Oh my gosh! I needed to go to bed laughing tonight! Thanks, lady! You ended my day on a high "note"! *toot!*

thedomesticfringe said...

So very funny! You're going to have to pull out the nose plugs every 4th of July. ;-)


togetherforgood said...

That's hilarious. :)

My older boy had a different sort of f-word related flag mishap when he was a toddler-- he pronounced "flag" like a cussword. And also "frog." And "basket," for reasons I never could figure out, was "f*$%-it" for about three months. LOL

Diane said...

Hilarious!!!! :O)

Graceful said...

I needed a good laugh today, and you just gave me one. Thank you!

Mary said...

Oh, it's all males, believe me!

To answer your questions about the Bill Cosby video:
Part 2 is pretty funny, but not as funny as Part 1.

Gabriele Agustini said...

Too, too funny!!
It's my first time here and I'm really enjoying my visit!